Thursday, April 14, 2011

Cones of eccentricity


I had a birthday this week. It was lovely, thanks. But it got me to wondering... At what age, exactly, can one be called "eccentric"? 'Cause that's what I'm going for. I'm 44 now. How much longer do I need to wait? You can get away with so much more when people think you're eccentric.

The other day, I went to Costco with my family. As we were walking in from the parking lot, I spotted an elderly woman pushing her full cart out to her car. But wait, there's more. When she left the store, she ran into one of those giant orange cones that they have in the front to try to keep people from driving into the store. And yes, the cone led they way out to her car. No, she didn't seem to realize that she was pushing an orange cone with her cart. At least, not until she got to her car. Of course, she left the cone out there in the parking lot. In back of someone else's car. Probably made that person wonder when they got to their car... But do you see? That can be chalked up to eccentricity.

I want to push a giant orange cone around in front of my shopping cart.

Maybe even carry a cone around with me as a warning to others. "Caution: You don't know what this person will do next."

It's not like I'm asking to be able to shuffle around with my knee high hose bunched up around my ankles. Not unless they're paired with slippers, anyway.

So really? How long do I have to wait? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller...? Bueller...?


Phoenix-Karenee said...

Baby steps to eccentricity... There ought to be a book. :P It starts with a willingness to be seen that way. And I think you should make the cone into a hat.

Thanks for the smile!

Duane Scott said...

This is truly hilarious! :) I think you have to be 69. I'm sorry to break it to you.

However, I have some homework for you.

Next time you go to Costco, do what that old lady did and see if people pass you off as eccentric.

You may get away with it!


Jeffy said...

It's easier for men. We're expected to get dumber as we go. Women have to carry the dignity of the family on their shoulders. You probably have a long way to go.

Happy late birthday!

SarahBeeCreations said...

I'm not sure just pushing the cone around counts as eccentric. I think one would have to wear an orange cone hat w/ matching mini-cone earrings to be truly eccentric. It's a process but I think you are safely on your way. Graceful eccentricity by the time you are 50? Wouldn't want to strain anything or break a hip by going too quickly.
Happy Birthday again, my friend!

PS: My word verification comes up as "armlyg" - I think your word verification is stalking my blog. It's eerily relevant.

Dusty Rayburn said...

I once saw an orange caution cone hat... might be easier to handle than pushing one everywhere. Of course, you would have to watch out for the overhead clearances.

Kelly Sauer said...

I was gonna say - or, you could wear it as a hat...

Helen said...

I'm a few years younger than you, and I get taken for eccentric when I sing in the grocery store.

Sarah and Dusty, I actually HAVE an orange cone hat! (somewhere)

lifeshighway said...

I don't think eccentric has an age. I think it is a state of mind (or lack there of) so if you feel that you want to walk the enlighten path be our guest.

Oh and of course write about it.