Friday, January 28, 2011

I don't know why anyone would be suspicious of me


The one-liners

I'm feeling very unfollowy today. Silence is not always golden, people.

I may or may not have taken on another alter ego last night.

mychiapet @CandySteele I can't believe you'd rather have chia poop than me.

RT @FatherKelly I like to drink hot chocolate at my window and constantly motion to the people shoveling my driveway that they "missed a spot."

The ones that are a little longer

okiewife Sick people need their rest, so goodnight y'all.

weightwhat @okiewife You're not that sick. Oh! You mean ill! Okay, off to bed with you then.

five_monkies I really should go to bed. But talking to SIL has been "informative". Never knew hubs liked parachute pants! LMAO And Jerry Curl.

weightwhat @five_monkies Who DOESN'T like parachute pants and Jheri curl?

weightwhat Why yes, there IS a twitter ho-down today! Are YOU in it?

saphyreplatypus @weightwhat why yes, I am, and for flatulence none-the-less! ;-)

weightwhat @saphyreplatypus Hey, everybody has to have a claim to fame.

The ones that are even longer

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Happy Monday?

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Oxymoron?

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Who are you calling a moron? Bit early, don't you think?

weightwhat @SBeeCreations It's never too early for morons.

SBeeCreations I didn't know there was a BoSa donuts in Tempe!

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Is that good or bad?

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Both!!

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Mmmm... Doughnuts...

And the 'why don't you post the whole conversation' ones

SBeeCreations I have no idea how many ounces BabyBee drinks in a 24 hour period. Need to know how much of a stash I have to have for next Wednesday-Thurs

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Do you keep formula on hand for emergencies?

SBeeCreations @weightwhat nope - I have none

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Any chance you could get some? I used to mix formula and breast milk together when I didn't have enough breast milk on hand.

kelybreez @weightwhat @SBeeCreations I'm so glad I get to follow this conversation. Pity those who don't follow you both.

duane_scott @kelybreez Me too, dude. @weightwhat and @sbeecreations know no limits.

weightwhat @duane_scott You have no idea.

duane_scott @weightwhat You have educated me on so many things... I'm not sure if I owe you or if you owe me... my innocence.

weightwhat @duane_scott Just givin' ya what ya need, whether you like it or not.

SBeeCreations @duane_scott @kelybreez @weightwhat for heaven's sake, it's just breastmilk. You'd have no problems talking about cow milk. That's weirder

dlrayburn @SBeeCreations @duane_scott did someone mention udders? @kelybreez @weightwhat

weightwhat @dlrayburn Remember Dusty, don't call them udders.

kelybreez @SBeeCreations @dlrayburn @duane_scott @weightwhat / Goodness, I go to LifeGroup and look what I miss! And I'm glad I missed it!

weightwhat @kelybreez Oh, c'mon Kely! With all those kids you've never had a breastmilk discussion? Really?

kelybreez @weightwhat Far too many. Never having another one would be fine by me.

weightwhat @kelybreez Do you suffer from lactation envy? Is that it?

kelybreez @weightwhat You take that back. I am lactation intolerant.

weightwhat @kelybreez Surely there must be a pill you can take for that. And yes, I called you Shirley.

kelybreez @weightwhat I refuse the pill. And don't call me Shirley.

SBeeCreations Wait, what? “@mychiapet: What? You don't like my chia pet? I see how you are.”

weightwhat @SBeeCreations How could you not like a chia pet?

okiewife @weightwhat Chia pets are too modern for me. I still have my pet rocks because they are so easy to care for.

weightwhat @okiewife You'd think so, but I managed to kill my pet rock. Such a sad story.

okiewife @weightwhat Are you sure it wasn't deliberate? You could have just given it to a poor homeless person.

weightwhat @okiewife Well, my mom told me that it went to live on a farm. Now that I'm a grown up, I know what that means...

WritingJoy Pajamas to the bus stop this morning. @weightwhat will be proud.

weightwhat @WritingJoy You know I am!

WritingJoy @weightwhat I'm basking in the glow of your approval right now. Almost brightens this gray gloomy day.

weightwhat @WritingJoy Well, I am Sweetness and Light™, so I spread sunshine wherever I go.

WritingJoy @weightwhat ::snort:: I just choked on my throat lozenge.

weightwhat @WritingJoy What are you trying to say?

WritingJoy @weightwhat that I need the Heimlich.

mychiapet @SBeeCreations What? You don't like my chia pet? I see how you are.

SBeeCreations Wait, what? “@mychiapet: What? You don't like my chia pet? I see how you are.”

mychiapet @SBeeCreations What did @mychiapet ever do to you?

SBeeCreations Nothing! Why are you picking on me? “@mychiapet: What did @mychiapet ever do to you?”

mychiapet @SBeeCreations You don't like to be picked? How about poked then? *poke poke poke*

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Did you see that I'm being harassed by a chia pet bot? Still?

weightwhat @SBeeCreations That bot sure is personal. Are you sure it's a bot?

mychiapet @SBeeCreations Who are you callin' a bot?!

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Nope! Not anymore!

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations Are you the reason "Ch Ch Ch Cha Chia" is now following me? HAHAHAHAHA

SBeeCreations @Helenatrandom Probably! I don't know why it started up with me, but now it won't stop! Guess I'll have to stop watering it

mychiapet @SBeeCreations No need to get all violent...

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations If you check out its followers, you'll see they are few. Also check out who Chia is following... JUST US!!! HAHAHAHAHa!

SBeeCreations @Helenatrandom HA! That is mighty suspicious! Must be one of us.... a mole!

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations A chia pet mole!

saphyreplatypus @SBeeCreations me thinks a certain person in WA may know a thing or two about said Chia. I'm looking at you @weightwhat! Lol!

weightwhat @saphyreplatypus Wha...?

SBeeCreations @saphyreplatypus @weightwhat Cha cha cha chia!

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations Leave it to me to investigate who follows the Chia!!!

SBeeCreations @Helenatrandom I have to say, you are looking a little suspect!

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations Well, I know it's not me, and so does Wendy, er... I mean Chia!

ImAPennyPincher @Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations I think it's Wendy. She said she created a new profile the other day.

Helenatrandom @ImAPennyPincher @SBeeCreations I'm thinking the same thing, since Chia started following all her aliases (alii?) first!

ImAPennyPincher @Helenatrandom Yup.

SBeeCreations @ImAPennyPincher @Helenatrandom Ah ha! It must be Casey! Trying to throw me off the scent. Naturally, one would suspect @weightwhat - Tricky

Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations Naturally!!!!

ImAPennyPincher @Helenatrandom @SBeeCreations I got a message from @mychiapet last night. I immediately thought it was Wendy. She's crazy enough to do it.

saphyreplatypus @ImAPennyPincher I do remember hearing Wendy speak of another "alter ego"

ImAPennyPincher @saphyreplatypus YES! I remember too. Glad someone else does.

Helenatrandom @ImAPennyPincher @SBeeCreations @mychiapet Yes, but then, so are any of us! But yes, I agree from the list of people Chia follows it is her

ImAPennyPincher @Helenatrandom 100% her.

ImAPennyPincher Good grief how many alter egos does @weightwhat have? Like 10??

SBeeCreations @Helenatrandom @ImAPennyPincher Yes, @mychiapet only seems to appear when @weightwhat is online

SBeeCreations @ImAPennyPincher No wonder she needs Tweetdeck to keep up with them! @weightwhat

saphyreplatypus @weightwhat oh do not even try to claim innocence, we have seen the mischief within.

weightwhat @saphyreplatypus I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about.

weightwhat @SBeeCreations @Helenatrandom @ImAPennyPincher @saphyreplatypus Wow, I go to lay down for a bit and you all gang up on me?! Shocking!!!

ImAPennyPincher @weightwhat You know it!

SBeeCreations @weightwhat @helenatrandom @imapennypincher @saphyreplatypus Feeling chia petty? ;P

weightwhat @SBeeCreations Wow... Y'all just have too much time on your hands, don't you? *snort* (@helenatrandom @imapennypincher @saphyreplatypus)

saphyreplatypus @weightwhat "the force is strong in this one" #mischief

weightwhat @saphyreplatypus *waving hand* This is not the chia pet you're looking for.


SarahBeeCreations said...

Good for a reread whenever you're feeling chiapetty!

kelybreez said...

When I see my name in a Twitter Ho-down, it:

A) makes my weekend start excellently in marvelous light

B) makes me look over my shoulder to make sure none of my children are looking at my ignominious, dubitable fame

C) makes me fall on my knees in repentance

D) makes me run around the room like a dog after a bath

E) transports me to ethereal realms where chia pets reside in bliss and glory

F) All of the above.

Anonymous said...

Maybe I'll rethink not owning a chia pet if that green growth is edible. But if I get one, I don't think I'll tell ANYONE! And I still have my pet rocks because they are painted, some have tails, and they have little painted eyes that watch every thing that happens in the house. I just couldn't settle for a plain ol' rock. I'm strange that way. And I'm in good company.

katdish said...

I've got this weird scene from Sybil where all the children come out from behind a tree, except they all have @ symbols for heads.

Duane Scott said...

F, Kelly... F!!!!

That sounded better in my head.

These are my favorite posts.

So I pick F.

*dusts himself off, returns to normal town*

Casey said...

I knew it! Oh you think you are sooo slick. Pffft. I knew it was you from the start. ChiaPet. Only YOU would think of that.

And I agree with Kelly and Duane... F) All of the above. YAY for my name being in the Ho-Down. Yee Haw.

Helen said...

It does make my week when I see that I have made it into the twitter ho down.

saphyreplatypus said...

woohoo! I made the ho-down two weeks in a row! Gas and jedi mind tricks, works like a charm! ;-)

I think I will look for a Chia-shrek this week. Too bad there isn't a chia-inigo montoya, inconceivable!