So, you've come back for your dose of torture twitter folly, have you? Well you're in luck, because I've actually put together a post this week. More proof that miracles still happen today. Go ahead, be thrilled.
The one-liners
"A clean house is a sign of a broken computer." (RT @Principled)
I am the life of the party at parties I've never even been to.
Sharks watch 'Weightwhat Week' on TV.
Thank you! I'll be here all week!
Hubby's turn to use the computer. Wonder if he'll use it for good or for evil. Again.
LA LA LA! I'M NOT LISTENING!
Your opinion is noted. And now I shall taunt you a second time! PFFFFTTTT!!!! *said with an outrrrrageous accent!*
Guess what? I'm not listening to ABBA! Yup, I'm listening to the Bay City Rollers.
A little bit longer ones
weightwhat @marni71 What did you used to be before you turned into a raisin?
marni71 @weightwhat What kind of fruit resembles skinny, stacked and tan? That was me...;-)
weightwhat @marni71 How do you balance watermelons on a toothpick, anyway?
sarahmsalter @weightwhat Woman, I'm too tired for semantics tonight.
weightwhat @sarahmsalter But you're not too tired to use the word 'semantics'?
dlrayburn @sarahmsalter blog phoooie...hoooie
weightwhat @dlrayburn You kiss your mama with that mouth?
mahjerle I am suddenly quite b!*chy and this time I have no steroids to blame.
weightwhat @mahjerle Admitting it is the first step to taking out a 2x4 and pummeling the next jerk who needs it.
The ones that are even longer
weightwhat @Schnik Why am I not surprised?
Schnik @weightwhat Because you're a calm, rational person?
weightwhat @Schnik That does describe me completely...
Schnik @weightwhat As does: Wild and Wooly.
weightwhat @Schnik Who told you about my leg hair?
weightwhat @SBeeCreations Cute! And don't you just love toys that make noise? Yeah.
SBeeCreations @weightwhat My favorite! Better than noisy toys w/batteries, though. They usually end up sounding possessed in a closet somewhere
weightwhat @SBeeCreations I like it when the battery operated toys mysteriously disappear.
dlrayburn @weightwhat TWSS .. and WTMI :-P
weightwhat @dlrayburn BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
katdish So...trying to check off a bunch of stuff from my To-Do list this morning. Think I need to take a short breather. Hello, #AngryBirds!
weightwhat @katdish Maybe you should add more things to your list that you've already done just so you can check them off. Wake up: check. Eat: check.
katdish @weightwhat You, my friend, are a GENIUS! I love that idea! Cleared another level of #AngryBirds..CHECK!
weightwhat @katdish I do what I can.
br8kthru @sarahmsalter We had two really nice days on Monday/Tuesday but now we're back to cloudy. Getting colder too!
sarahmsalter @br8kthru How cold is "colder"?
weightwhat @sarahmsalter A little warmer than 'coldest.'
sarahmsalter @weightwhat Woman, don't mess with me today. I'm in a good mood & I'd like to stay that way. :-P
weightwhat @sarahmsalter Mess, mess, mess.
sarahmsalter @weightwhat You ain't the judge of me!
weightwhat @sarahmsalter Clearly you haven't noticed my robe and gavel.
sarahmsalter @weightwhat A bathrobe and rubber mallet don't count.
weightwhat @sarahmsalter Says you.
And the 'why don't you just post the whole conversation' ones
stretchmarkmama My dentist refers to hubs and me as "the clean teeth couple." Does this mean we've arrived?
weightwhat @stretchmarkmama Does this mean you don't have a plaque to put the honor on?
stretchmarkmama @weightwhat We keep the plaque on our bathroom mirror.
weightwhat @stretchmarkmama You mean after it goes flying off your floss?
stretchmarkmama @weightwhat We call those "dental floss home runs."
weightwhat @stretchmarkmama Congratulations. You just grossed out my husband. :o)
diam0ndhead94 I love Tillamook Mudslide ice cream. I got my chocolate!!!
weightwhat @diam0ndhead94 I'm sitting here with a pile of fun size chocolate bars in front of me. Not as many as there used to be though.
diam0ndhead94 @weightwhat So cruel, you are.
weightwhat @diam0ndhead94 What's that I hear? Yes! It's the call of the wild Reese's Peanut Butter Cup! Oh yes, it will be mine.
SBeeCreations @weightwhat Are they too busy having fun?
weightwhat @SBeeCreations Yes, at the party in my tummy. Yummy yummy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Os-CACRwM8
weightwhat @dlrayburn Has anyone warned you about my Twitter Ho-down? Well, now you're warned. And you're in it.
dlrayburn @weightwhat Oh my...Twitter Ho-down sounds scary. And no, they did not warn me.
weightwhat @dlrayburn Muahahahaha! *rubbing hands together all sinister-like*
dlrayburn @weightwhat stepping up my prayer life in preparation!
weightwhat @dlrayburn You might want to consider bathing in holy water while you're at it.
dlrayburn @weightwhat Oh my. DO I need to eat garlic too?
weightwhat @dlrayburn Possibly.
Helenatrandom @br8kthru @weightwhat @sarahmsalter Did you all participate in Cookie Day yesterday? I did, but I was late. #hadtobuythecookiesfirst
weightwhat @Helenatrandom I did have some cookies yesterday. They weren't good cookies, but they were cookies.
marni71 @weightwhat @Helenatrandom There's no such thing as a bad cookie. Just sayin...
weightwhat @marni71 If they have raisins in them they are bad cookies. Evil cookies, even.
marni71 @weightwhat What? Raisins are fruit and if a cookie has fruit in it, then it has no calories. Didn't you know that?
weightwhat @marni71 No, raisins are an abomination. God gave us grapes, then evil was done to them to make them raisins.
marni71 @weightwhat I'll pray for your hard heart. And then make you some oatmeal raisin cookies. Snort!
weightwhat @marni71 And you'll probably make them while listening to Prince, won't you? ABOMINATION!
marni71 @weightwhat Oooh! Good idea.
weightwhat @marni71 You're goin' straight to h!#^ in a handbasket, ain'tcha?
marni71 @weightwhat Because who DOESN'T like to gyrate as they bake?
weightwhat @marni71 I'm averting my eyes! And looking for earplugs.
Helenatrandom @marni71 Nudists? Oh wait... They don't like to gyrate and deep fry... Baking is okay...
weightwhat I'm back! And I have pretty toenails!
SBeeCreations @weightwhat picture?
weightwhat @SBeeCreations Nope, no toe pictures. I wouldn't want to cause anyone to stumble after beholding my toes.
SBeeCreations @weightwhat True. May be overwhelmed with beauty upon the beholding.
weightwhat @SBeeCreations And I just couldn't make everyone jealous like that.
SBeeCreations @weightwhat You're so thoughtful
weightwhat @SBeeCreations You know? I really am.
SBeeCreations I didn't realize pickles have zero calories. Tons of sodium but no calories. Hmm
weightwhat @SBeeCreations How is that possible?
SBeeCreations @weightwhat I don't know. Cucumbers, vinegar, salt, sodium chloride - no calories
katdish @SBeeCreations That's good to know. I wonder if deep-fried pickles have calories.
weightwhat @katdish That sounds like fair food, and fair food has no calories. Especially if eaten while wearing open-toed shoes.
katdish @weightwhat Or on a stick. If you eat fair food on a stick whilst wearing open toed shoes, you actually lose weight.
weightwhat @katdish I think I might try that diet. It sounds sensible.
sarahmsalter @dlrayburn @br8kthru Daggone it, I WILL!
weightwhat @sarahmsalter Someone needs their mouth washed out with soap and it's you. Such language! My virgin eyes!
sarahmsalter @weightwhat Well, a lot of times I say, "Dog Bite It!" instead of "Daggone it!" But I didn't want to confuse @dlrayburn with my vernacular.
weightwhat @sarahmsalter You're just tryin' to get struck by lightning, aren't you?
dlrayburn @weightwhat I think she is.
weightwhat @dlrayburn Hey, you're not far behind Mr. Pottymouth.
sarahmsalter @weightwhat What? (she says innocently)
weightwhat @sarahmsalter Libertine!
SBeeCreations Time for a glass of water!
sarahmsalter @SBeeCreations I just got one to take my nighttime meds with! :)
SBeeCreations @sarahmsalter good!
sarahmsalter @SBeeCreations We can drink our water together. :)
SBeeCreations @sarahmsalter It's so romantic ;)
weightwhat @SBeeCreations @sarahmsalter No, it's "rotic." Romantic without the man.
Congratulations! You've made it to the end! What are ya, a glutton for punishment?
Posts
6 comments:
Interesting video... Try imagining raisins in the place of the carrots and see how you make raisins feel! Oh yeah, I went THERE!!!
I love Twitter-Ho Down. How do you play? Other than having to actually be a twitter all the time. I need rules!
Oh, once again, I am EVER so glad that DM's are inadmissible!
And welcome to the Ho-Down, Dusty! I'm sorry you weren't warned. But now, you've been initiated.
lifeshighway - Well, all you need to do is get involved in some witty banter with me on the twitter. And be on the twitter all the time. ;o)
Bwahhahahaha! It's too bad one DM in particular could not be included. It was a real winner.
I think it's safe to say I have arrived.
LOL, Dd says you could not have a party in your tummy because everything would be all mushy! And why were you watching Yo Gabba Gabba
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