It's time for another Twitter Ho-down! Is the anticipation killing you? Then wait no longer! Read!
My daughter wants me to tell the twitter that she's freaking out our dog with the toy she just got out of a kids meal. Yup, that's my girl.
The horns are only there to keep the halo up.
Sorry. Saw something shiny.
Okay, I'm just gonna need to TWSS my last tweet there.
Oops! I always thought PETA stood for Please Eat This Animal. (RT @StephenAtHome)
Hi morning-where-I-was-about-to-leave-and-then-caught-the-cat-peeing-on-the-bed. He's going to make a fantastic hat. (RT @msamye)
How did THAT get in there?! #VagueTweet
If you can't say something nice, say something vague.
The ones I may or may not have tweeted in DM's - I admit to nothing
You just need to be more persuasive. Wanna borrow my cattle prod?
(cheeky | monkey)
So, where IS the other birthmark?
I'm guessing that a catheter would make sneezing a bit risky...
I guess not everyone can handle being this gorgeous.
Donkey shins to you, too.
Yes, but you have to pay extra for those ones.
Want me to take a nap for you? Because I totally will.
Don't make me get out my soapbox.
Maybe you should pin a note to your shirt.
Well, I have heard things... Is it true that you wear colored undies?
The ones that are a little bit longer
katdish Anyone who has an iPhone and is easily amused should get the Talking Carl app.
AboveAllFabric Bought the boots. seriously thought about hiding them from luke...but I came clean. yep. that's me being open and honest.
weightwhat Warning: I'm writing a blog post. Didn't want to catch anyone unaware and give them the fits.
kelli1227 Wow. It's really hard to sit still at work while you're listening to the Mamma Mia soundrack. Dancing Queen..Feel the beat on the tamborine!
lainiegallagher Activia was a bad choice.
The ones that are even longer
Schnik A must have from a job posting: "Strong computer and internet skillz" - Wow. I can haz thoze?
kelli1227 UGH! my left foot is swelling! It's too freakin early in my pregnancy for this crap to start :(!
Helenatrandom @weightwhat I am intimidated. Your arm pit farts blew my M&M catching right out of the water.
And the 'why don't you just post the whole conversation' ones
weightwhat My husband just announced the either he left food in his car or something died in there. He's going to inspect, Febreeze in hand, right now.
weightwhat Latest report: All he's found is the bloody hatchet...
weightwhat So Wendy, how are you doing today? Me? Oh, I'm just fine and dandy. And yourself? Not bad. Nice weather we're having, huh? Yup, lovely.
weightwhat Okay, I entered my diva name, Bella Apples, into it and it becomes Fusion Bessy. Just keeps getting better, doesn't it?
Schnik Wait, did you look up my past as a stripper?
weightwhat @redclaydiaries You should keep it. And possibly have it bronzed.
Congratulations! You've made it through another Ho-down! Now if you'll just make your way to your closet, you'll find ample room in there to sit down and rock back and forth.