I need to spend more time on the twitter

It's been a slow week on the twitter. So slow that I'll be including something in today's post that at first I hadn't intended posting. Sorry/you're welcome.

The one-liners

I have a house full of Girl Scout Cookies. Minus 1. Minus 2. Minus 3...

Huh. I had a package of Girl Scout Cookies sitting here a minute ago and now there's just an empty wrapper. Where'd they go?

And who drank my milk?

Finally got my Life is Funny post up. Hey, I gave up timeliness for Lent, remember?

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. Suffering leads to craving KFC. (RT @badbanana)

I'm following you. Not in a creepy, behind-you-in-the-parking-lot way, but in an excited-to-read-your-random-thoughts way.

When I see a man with a beard, mustache & glasses, I think, there's a man who took every precaution against someone doodling on his picture. (RT @funnyoneliners)

A little bit longer ones

Helenatrandom @weightwhat Oh if only you said something a little earlier... You know I ALWAYS listen to you....

weightwhat @Helenatrandom Listening to me is the only sensible thing to do. I am the voice of reason afterall.

CandySteele @weightwhat It's people like you that teach me to think on my feet, Wendy. Today, you were a text from RB....

weightwhat @CandySteele Hi. I'm Ron Burgandy.

pagan43 @weightwhat I am going to put on my tin foil hat & pajamas and go to bed. will work the same as "I have a headache?" #nottonite

weightwhat @pagan43 My guess is yes. Maybe even better than a headache. And for a longer period of time.

The ones that are even longer

billycoffey @weightwhat Did I say hello to you, Wendy? I must not have, because I'm sure you would have said hello back...

weightwhat @billycoffey No, you did not. *sniffle*

billycoffey @weightwhat Oh Wendy, you know you're my favorite.

weightwhat @billycoffey Oh, you're only saying that because it's true.

And the one you really shouldn't read. Don't say you weren't warned.

BridgetChumbley @sarahmsalter I like Oreos! Esp the double stuffs...

weightwhat @BridgetChumbley EEEEWWWW!!! TWSS.

makeadiff21 @weightwhat What'd she say???

BridgetChumbley @weightwhat hehehehe That is nasty! I missed it, totally!

Helenatrandom @weightwhat I am suddenly feeling like an ingenue... I don't get that last TWSS at all....

weightwhat @Helenatrandom Ignorance is bliss, Helen. Trust me.

sarahmsalter @Helenatrandom I don't get it either...

weightwhat @sarahmsalter You don't wanna know.

Helenatrandom @sarahmsalter @makeadiff21 Well, it looks like the three of us qualify for ingenuity.

weightwhat @Helenatrandom What are you trying to say about @BridgetChumbley and me? Hmmm...?

BridgetChumbley @weightwhat No kidding...

Nick_theGeek @weightwhat I"m trying to find the TWSS but I can't ... what am I missing?

weightwhat @Nick_theGeek Knowledge that you don't need to have. Ever.

Helenatrandom @weightwhat That you and @BridgetChumbley aren't as innocent as @makeadiff21, @sarahmsalter, and I are. Oh....and @Nick_theGeek

weightwhat @Helenatrandom Hmph!

BridgetChumbley @Helenatrandom Ouch! Remember who TWSS'd who... I just like chocolate cookies! #totallyinnocentdoublestufflover

weightwhat @BridgetChumbley GAAAAA!!!! "#totallyinnocentdoublestufflover" TWSS! Again!

makeadiff21 @BridgetChumbley Pahahahahaha! I wondered. I get it now. I guess I'm not so innocent afterall.

weightwhat @makeadiff21 Welcome to the dark side.

sarahmsalter @weightwhat OH MY GOSH! I think I get it now!

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Another one bites the dust.

BridgetChumbley RT @makeadiff21: RT @weightwhat: @makeadiff21 Welcome to the dark side. // It's more fun here :-) // Do you have cookies?

weightwhat @BridgetChumbley Don't give @BridgetChumbley the double stuffed! (they make her crazy!)

Now aren't you glad you'll have a week to recover? But if you're a glutton for punishment and can't get enough of the tweets, head over to Fellowship of the Traveling Smarty Pants to see what others have contributed to the Twitter Ho-down.