Friday, January 1, 2010

Happy New Year! A twitter post


(In case you were wondering what my boyfriend was doing this holiday season.)

Oooo... It's a new year and a new Twitter Ho-down! Wanna be a joiner? Head on over to Fellowship of the Traveling Smarty Pants and sign up to do your own Ho-down post. It will make your life complete.

The one-liners

I couldn't find a gift that conveys my general dislike for you, so I got you this fruitcake instead. (RT @thedayhascome)

Funny, I don't remember Toys R Us having been a joyless soul-sucking black hole of misery when I was a kid. (RT @superfantastic)

Dear Santa, Define "naughty." Love, Wendy

I don't like crafty homemade ornaments. I like them store-bought, like Jesus did. (RT @MarinkaNYC)

Why? Why?! WHY?! I'm now afraid of Christmas cards.


It's 5:40 am and yes, I have been awake for the last 2 hours. Can I please borrow a rubber mallet from someone?

I'm having a rip-roaring New Year's Eve here. Just me and my apple cinnamon herbal tea. Do I know how to have a good time, or what?

A little bit longer ones

marysmusings @weightwhat In true @Brian_Russell & my style, we waited 'til now to do any shopping. We're hitting up Walmart tomorrow. Wanna come along?

weightwhat @marysmusings GAAAA!!! *choke, gasp, wheeze!* Um, no thank you.

SBeeCreations @weightwhat Baby is on the move today! Crazy watching my stomach moving around like this. Reminds me of that Mummy movie with the scarabs

weightwhat @SBeeCreations You should write that down in the baby book.

Brian_Russell Walked by women holding thongs up to thmselves as someone (older man) they knew walked by and greeted them. #awkward

weightwhat @Brian_Russell Are you at Walmart?

Helenatrandom @weightwhat My LIF post is about how I am the worst Christmas Wrapper (not to be confused with Worst Christmas Rapper...)

weightwhat @Helenatrandom I'm glad you clarified. I was worried for a moment there.

PamperingBeki Taco Bell called my name for dinner and I answered. In other news, I should start working out again...

weightwhat @PamperingBeki Okay, I just have to ask... When Taco Bell said your name, did it sound suspiciously like a little tan Chihuahua?

sarahmsalter @SBeeCreations My cousin Adam swears by the Tazo Joy tea.

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Does he really stand by it and swear? What a potty-mouth.

makeadiff21 Ok. Should I be worried that my 3 yo knows what a conga line is?

weightwhat @makeadiff21 Depends. Does the 3 year old also put lampshades on their head?

The ones that are even longer

katdish @sarahmsalter You're welcome and good morning. Sort of dragging today. I think I have the Christmas blues.

sarahmsalter @katdish How come? Maybe you should dress Buddy Love like an elf & take him to the mall to meet Santa. That'll chase away the blues! :o)

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Yes @katdish, please dress up Buddy Love! It's been days since you've humiliated your dog.

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Really? I don't remember implying anything, either. Are you deep in my subconcious or something?

sarahmsalter @weightwhat Oh, that's a frightening thought. *shudder* Skittles! I need Skittles quickly! I need to taste a rainbow!

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Fear my subconscious!

katdish You'd better watch out, he's coming to town!


katdish And frankly, he's not amused.


weightwhat @katdish I think Buddy Love's plot to kill you has only been foiled due to his lack of opposable thumbs.

katdish @CandySteele I love a good lollygag.

CandySteele @katdish uh huh - I'll leave the TWSS to someone else.

weightwhat @CandySteele *snort* Candy finally got a TWSS of her own, even if she won't admit to it!

CandySteele @weightwhat I said "TWSS" at the family Christmas and my kids looked at me in horror. You guys have corrupted me.

weightwhat @CandySteele We only corrupt the ones we love.

And the ‘why don’t you just post the whole conversation’ ones

sarahmsalter @katdish I understand. I have a headache trying to start. So, I'm going to eat Japanese for lunch. It can only make me feel better, right?

weightwhat @sarahmsalter You're going to eat the Japanese? Is that before or after you terrorize the city?

sarahmsalter @weightwhat I'm going to a Japanese restaurant to eat teriyaki chicken with broccoli, carrots, & rice.

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Well what fun is that? A Japanese lunch just wouldn't be complete without people running, pointing and yelling, "GODZIRRA!"

sarahmsalter @weightwhat Nah, I prefer it a little calmer and quieter for lunch.

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Why do you hate fun?

sarahmsalter @CandySteele Seriously: It's stiff when I stand. I have to walk awhile to get it loosened up. And if I sit w/ it bent, it starts to hurt.

SBeeCreations @sarahmsalter (TWHS)

sarahmsalter @SBeeCreations I tried to clarify that I was talking about MY BUM KNEE. I knew somebody would TWHS me over it. *sigh*

weightwhat @sarahmsalter You probably thought it would be me, didn't you?

sarahmsalter @weightwhat I didn't realize you were lurking. I SHOULD'VE known. And you've corrupted our sweet little mama @SBeeCreations now! FOR SHAME!

weightwhat @sarahmsalter Then my job here is done.

So there you go, the first twitter post of the new year. Things are looking up already now, aren't they?


katdish said...


Oh, and I LAUGHED!

Sarah Salter said...

I was out of town most of the week... How did I make so many appearances in the Ho-Down? Gaaa!

Candace Jean July 16 said...

Talk about a day late and a dollar short - I just saw this post and wondered if you knew where she got that coconut bra. I have a friend who needs one in a couple of weeks.