Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Summer is out to get me

Two posts in two days from me?! Inconceivable! Well, before you get yourself all worked up into a lather, it's not really two whole posts. This one is mostly a reprint of an old post. See? All is right with the world afterall.

Over at Bridget's blog, she's doing the One Word at a Time blog carnival. Now I usually don't join in on this blog carnival because, well, it's just too deep for me. But this week's topic, Summer, is one that can be found in the shallow end of the pool. Although, if you go and check out some of the other posts there, some people are still seriously swimming in the deep end. I'll be needing my water wings now.

Summer. What do I think of when I hear that word? Sunburn. Crispy, fried, blister-covered skin. Temperatures so hot it makes my freckles start to melt. And S'mores. Hey, there's always room for chocolate.


A little background on me. I grew up in Southern California, not terribly far from the beach. I have red hair and blue eyes. Do you know what comes with that combination? Fair skin. Now I'm not talking Snow White fair. That chick is tan compared to me. I'm talking pasty white. With freckles. I've burnt to blister more times than I like to remember. (And yes, I get yearly skin checks at the dermatologist.) I've even managed to burn the BOTTOM of my feet. Now that's saying something. Of course, all my friends were tan. All of them. They liked standing next to me because it made them look even darker. I always wanted to be tan...

Back when I was in junior high, one of my friends was having a pool party for her birthday. Fun, huh? Yeah. All my friends were slathering on baby oil so they could get even darker than they already were, and I was jealous. So, yeah, I grabbed the baby oil myself.

Anyone see where this is going?

I spent most of our pool time floating around on a raft under that bright California sun. I kept checking myself, but I didn't seem to be turning color at all. So I just continued to float around, sunning myself like everyone else.

Or not.

When I got home, I realized that I was fried. Lobsters everywhere were jealous of the deep red color of my skin. I probably could have toasted marshmallows with the heat coming off my skin. Well, part of my skin anyway. Did I mention that I didn't turn over the entire day? Oh yeah, bright red on the front of my body, ghostly white on the back. And a very clear line where the two colors met. I looked like a different person coming and going. It was not a good look on me.

But wait, there's more.

When in a situation like this, most would try to hide the two-toned skin under clothing, right? Yes, that would have been ideal. Except for one small problem. I was on a swim team at the time. I was forced to wear a swimsuit, in front of a lot of people, and show off the glory that was my skin. There was much pointing and laughing as I tried to get into the water as quickly as possible. Good thing I was in junior high at the time. Nothing is embarrassing in junior high, right?


Kristi Fornshell said...

Your descriptive powers have no equal.
Yes Junior High classmates are always very kind and sensitive to one another.

I have a sudden craving for lobster...I do however prefer melted butter to baby oil.
Trader Joe's has 8 oz packages of lobster chunks in the freezer section for about $7.00.
I'm going shopping.

jasonS said...

Okay, we can call off the apocalypse (dang, that's a hard word to spell). If we do ever see two posts in two days... well, God have mercy on our souls... (said in all Christian love) :)

Glynn said...

Our oldest surprised us with red hair, blue-green eyes - and fair skins. He can get a sunburn by glancing through a window to see what they weather is outside. He grw up beliving that the most important thing you could say to a person was "did you put on sun-screen?"

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA I am laughing so hard! This is the best post EVER! I cannot believe that you put on baby oil! Oh my goodness. I'm not a redhead, but I've got the blue eyes, pasty skin, and freckles. I have burnt to a crisp many times, but I cannot say I've ever made THAT mistake. And only on one side, no less!

HAHAHAHAHA Thank you so much!

Wendy said...

Jason - If we call off the apocolypse, can we still bottle the fragrance?

jasonS said...

We may have to change the marketing a little, but I think it could still work. Hey, you think we could get Kirk Cameron to be our spokesperson? :)

Duane Scott said...

HAHA! I laughed right out loud on this one. I'm sorry. I'm laughing with you, not at you. I promise.

Okay, I'm laughing at you. But you put the story out there so we could. So in reality, I'm just being respectful of the laughing at friends rules.

Now I'm all confused.

katdish said...

Tans easily, baby-oil slathering friend here. I am grateful for my friend Laurie, who, like you, is pasty white with freckles. We went to Port Aransas for Spring break "back in the day". Me? Tan. Her? Burned so bad she couldn't drive back to Houston. I learned how to drive her 5 speed that summer. What a blessing she was.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Wendy... my SoCal sister. I used to slather on the baby oil and let myself cook (I've had heat stroke too many times as a teen). Fortunately I have olive skin, but I worry about the possibility of problems in the future. I can visualize the red skin and heat radiating from your bod.

Thanks for the laugh (I feel your pain).

Helen said...

I had bright red hair as a child. I don't know what happened to it....
Anyway, I feel your pain. I mean that literally.

Rebecca on The Homefront said...

Well, I'm not quite as fair as you, apparently...blonde hair, blue eyes, vampirish skin tone. Except that one time in high school, when I went with a friend to see her boyfriend the lifeguard...it was overcast most of the day,and I was a painful lobster most of the month after. :P Thankfully, I wasn't on a swimteam...ouch.

JoAnne Bennett said...

What a fun post, especially being a CA girl as well. My olive-colored skin could turn a toasty brown in less time than it took to put on the baby oil :). My high school friends were often envious. But the whole time I was reading your post, I kept thinking about the time I got so sunburned that I was vomiting and seeing things that weren't there. Literally, I could feel your pain. Thanks for sharing!